Rebecca Gayheart has given a deeper insight into the reality of her ex Eric Dane‘s life after his motor neurone disease diagnosis.
Despite the former couple no longer being together, she went in to battle for him with insurance companies to make sure he had around the clock care during the 53-year-old’s ongoing health struggle.
The 54-year-old actress opened up about becoming one of his carers in a deeply personal essay for The Cut and revealed the former Greys Anatomy heartthrob “has 24/7 nurses now.”
Gayheart took over Dane’s medical care and in the essay explained that even just trying to figure out the healthcare system is one thing – but navigating the insurance companies and getting claims denied has been a lot to deal with.
She wrote that when she was trying to get home nursing care, “the woman from his insurance said to me, ‘You can keep applying, and I’ll keep denying,’ I was like, ‘Oh? F that.’
“I made it my mission. I was ‘locked in,’ as the kids would say. I crashed out, and then I locked it in.”
Gayheart has previously said her and Dane’s dynamic was “super complicated” but she refused to give up and eventually got her request for his care approved.
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Dane now requires 24/7 care and she explained that it is divided in 21 shifts.
“There are times that shifts aren’t covered, so I cover them. There was a 12-hour shift recently that I could not cover. I could only do four hours because of all the stuff that the kids are doing,” she explained.
The actress, who shares daughters Billie, 15, and Georgia, 13, with the actor, explained that she had to call on some of his friends to help out because she really needed someone who could step in and fill that gap.
Gayheart admitted neither of them had ever taken care of him in that way, and she was hesitant to ask, but when she said she needed the help they both showed up.
But that hasn’t been the case with everyone in her life.
“There are a lot of people who used to be more present in my life who I think about and wonder, ‘Where’d they go?'” she recalled.
She said she’s “talked to my therapist about it a lot,” and realised that “most people are not great in this situation because it’s so heavy.”
Dane was first diagnosed with MND, known in America mostly as amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (ALS), aka Lou Gehrig’s disease, in April.
It is a progressive degenerative disease that affects motor nerves that allow a person to move, swallow, talk and breathe.
Earlier this month he was speaking at a virtual event for the non-profit organisation I am ALS when he addressed the mental toll of the disease.
“I have no reason to be in a good spirit at any time, on any given day,” he said.
“I don’t think anybody would blame me if I went upstairs in my bedroom, crawled under the sheets, and spent the next two weeks crying.
“[But] I was a little bit pleasantly surprised when I realised that I wasn’t built like that, because I thought for sure that was gonna be me.”
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